3.29.2013

it's banana bread... get over it. {and why i'll never be a food blogger}

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i thought i'd be adventurous and make banana bread this last weekend. in doing so, i discovered something significant about myself...

it's safe to say, i'll never be a food blogger. 

that's right. i'm fairly certain i'll never be the author of one of those chic food blogs with its dreamy photography that you love to visit and plan on following so much that, surely, it will magically turn you into the best chef you never imagined you could be... by sheer osmosis, if nothing else. nope. that's not me.

let me count the ways...

first, i'm just not a master at photographing the preparation of food, nor the final product. i either have to cook or photograph. i can't do both. it's the cold, hard fact that i'm learning to accept.

i look at some of these food blogs and think "how in the world do they do it?" as i picture them working magic all around their kitchen, camera in one hand, mixing spoon in the other, while everything else just falls into place all by itself... ingredients, picture-perfect work spaces, ambient lighting... all that stuff just does its own thing on its own... something like those various inanimate {in the real world} objects that dance around in the animated beauty and the beast story.

or... maybe these commoner-turned-pro cooks are hiring professional teams of photographers and stylists that make everything look like a feature spread in martha stewart living. i don't know.

i just know this. while my camera dials are getting covered in flour and oily finger prints, i take rushed, blurry photos, made even blurrier by the jiggling of my camera because i can't stop laughing when my husband {who said banana bread is for} walks through the room, sees me clicking away, and responds to what he just witnessed ever-so-nonchalantly as he exits with two succinct statements...

"it's banana bread. get over it."


bahahahahaha!

{i guess that's the second reason why i'll never be a food blogger... i don't take ridicule well.}

at that point, i just sort of gave up and thought, "yeah... who am i trying to kid? or impress? i will stick to just making banana bread."

third, even if i could take fabulous food pictures, i'm just not a natural in the kitchen... at all. {although, i did make a mean pasta with tomato sauce and cream cheese concoction for dinner the following night!} seriously, though. it would be quite an irony for me to show-and-tell any potential readers how to make something in the kitchen while attempting to come across as though i know what i'm doing... when, in reality, i'm so much closer to the man we know and love as mr. brady in the clip below than i am to martha stewart... clumsy and a little bit of a kitchen dork.

even if by some small miracle i could ever come up with my own unique book- or blog-worthy recipe, or if i could modify someone else's recipe to make it the most delicious version out there, i'd still not be very savvy in the kitchen... when it comes to the actual making of this imaginary wonderful dish.

i'm just not sophisticated with the whole thing. it's an awkward site, to be sure. i'd love nothing more than if i looked like the chefs on everyday food while i cook... so calm. so quiet. so neat. with me it's stress and mess.

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this is just the beginning of how messy i was by the time i was done. yes... that's what aprons are for. i know. but trust me. even an apron wouldn't save me from the disaster zone i can create when you give me a bowl, a spoon or two, and a plethora of dry ingredients.

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i had to include this photo of mr. b, too... because it illustrates just how nice my hubby is under all that humorous sarcasm. he acted as a stand-in for my photo so i could get the focus just right on my timer self-portrait above. what a guy!... and all he wanted was some banana bread, poor thing.

well... just to further show how unsavvy with food-blogging i am, i forgot to take a picture of the final product... my sweet baked bread all fancy-like, sliced up and sitting on a pretty plate with a perfect beverage by its side. but that said, it was delicious banana bread, and there just aint no time for photographing delicious banana bread! there's only time for eatin'!!

anyway, like i said earlier, if you want a glimpse of what it looks like when i'm in the kitchen, watch this...



haha. typical brady bunch cornball cheese. but appropriate for my in-the-kitchen post, as we are going for a very similar aesthetic in our mid-century modern kitchen to what you can see in theirs {swooning over that avocado green mixer they had!}. in fact, did you notice those boomerang countertops in my photos above? i'd absolutely love to replace them someday with something just like what was in the brady kitchen {but my backsplash will be white subway tile, i think}.

thanks to the retro renovation blog i've been following recently {with all it's fabulous tips on mid-century modern restoration}, i know that particular laminate color is still available. squeal!

...not that we are trying to go for an exact replica of the brady bunch kitchen. but i do love that color for a counter.

and who knows? maybe, just maybe, orange counters can magically turn my food preparation works {and the photos of them} into master pieces.

or..................... maybe orange counters can't do a darn thing for my kitchen skills, and my creations will still bring on the deflated failure-flavored wahnah-wahnah-wah, wahnah-wahnah-wah, wahnah-wahnah-wah that they always have.

but i'll still have pretty counters!
;)

10 comments:

  1. You post has made us laugh so hard!! Honestly we get a little discouraged too.. Every time we go to take a photo our lighting gets in the way!! We are convinced that some bloggers have professional studios.

    Cooking, photography, editing, and blogging take work!! Unless you are a blogger, i dont think people understand how much work it is..

    All that being said, we enjoy it soooo much, even if our little blog never make it big, its sometime we will leave behind and know that we inspired people to get in the kitchen...

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  2. You post has made us laugh so hard!! Honestly we get a little discouraged too.. Every time we go to take a photo our lighting gets in the way!! We are convinced that some bloggers have professional studios.

    Cooking, photography, editing, and blogging take work!! Unless you are a blogger, i dont think people understand how much work it is..

    All that being said, we enjoy it soooo much, even if our little blog never make it big, its sometime we will leave behind and know that we inspired people to get in the kitchen...

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  3. MAAAAAYBE you could be the "The Food Blogger Who Isn't"...lol...that would be waaaaaaay more entertaining anyway than those "Martha Stewart-esque" food blogs in my opinion :)

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  4. =)
    thanks ya'll.

    loved your comments! =)

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  5. I am sitting here giggling, getting side glances from my Mr. B - who, by the way, also makes comments such as 'oh God, now she is taking pictures of banana bread'. Loads of rolled eyes when I attempt to channel my inner Pioneer Woman/Martha Stewart. Epic Fail!

    Loving those orange counter tops myself. That Brady Bunch really had it going on.

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  6. hahaha... nice to know i'm not alone, nicki. your comment made me giggle. i should write posts that poke fun at myself more often. i get the best comments!! =)

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  7. It's the COOKING AND BAKING SCHOOL OF HARD KNOCKS.

    Remember Dad's joke?

    Newlyweds sitting down to eat.

    Wife: I'm sorry, honey, I forgot to tell you that I only know how to make two things. Spaghetti and strawberry pie.
    Husband: Which one is this?
    :)

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  8. Love that black & white shot! The brady bunch clip is a riot! Boy that show brings back memories :o)

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  9. hahaha... i know. good memories!!

    thanks, elena. i'm guessing you're not talking about the b+w pic of me, but rather the first one of the bowl and dry ingredients. =)

    of all the pics, i like that one, too... it's got some visual interest in the contrasting tones and in the shadows and texture. i guess it wasn't all al wash, hah? i at least got one good photo out of it... the one that caused me to have flour all over my camera button.

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