2.02.2011

a year later...

almost exactly a year ago to the day, i did a post called

{a different self-portrait} i am

i was reminded of it yesterday when a newly added flickr contact saw my self-portraits set and commented on one of them.

since so much has changed in one year, i decided i would repost that post, but cross out the things that have changed and add in a few things that are new {in purple}. a year ago, i held little hope that i would ever be a mom or that this is where life would take me... where God would have me. i remember getting home from running errands one day, and before i went up to our second-story house apartment, i thought i might take some self-portrait photos {using the hood of my car as a tripod} to remember exactly how i looked and who i was at that time in my life. now i'm kind of glad i did it. it's sort of chilling to look back and see how much has changed... how much God can do in a life i thought was destined to be one way, but never another.

so below, is my re-post of {a different self-portrait} i am.

i am not afraid

i am...

not afraid.
thirty-eightnine.
a woman who still feels like a little girl.
longing to be a mother. a mama-to-be.
a friend.
a sister.
a daughter.
a wife.
a lover.
a christian.
a romantic.
a dreamer.
a crier.
an artist.
a twin.
the best three-legged race partner my twin will ever know.
in love with love.
a singer.
creative.
passionate.
imperfect.
a perfectionist.
type b personality {according to those test thingies}.
optimistic.
pessimistic.
weak.
strong. working on being stronger.
silly a lot.
always cold.
a big fan of the beach.
a sun-lover.
an amateur.
immature.
holding on.
nostalgic.
a tea-drinker.
a night person.
wanting to be a morning person.
smart enough to get by.
a craver of learning.
a bird-lover.
a procrastinator.
not the best communicator.
a former television watcher.
a fan of m*a*s*h, monk and house.
a pack rat who craves simplicity. much more simple {i had a garage sale}.
a dark chocolate person.
very content after a good nap.
a collector.
changing.
a graphic designer.
very critical of myself.
a film buff.
soft-spoken.
green-eyed.
much different-looking than even just five years one year ago. {eh-hem... think belly! i'm now to the point where i can no longer see my feet!}
a believer in the "eat right for your blood type" theory.
full of regrets.
a college graduate.
a contradiction to myself in so many ways.
a starter.
not a finisher.
a wishful thinker.
a runner.
most at peace in autumn.
one who suffers from seasonal affective disorder.
a lover of good design.
good with spacial problems.
not who i thought i was.
told often that i am gentle.
an impatient driver.
not a book reader, but wishing i was.
one who thinks believes music is the greatest thing in life.
not many of the things i used to be.
one of the things i thought i'd never be.
so many things that i have not been before.
a bit of a germ-a-phobe
{but not obsessive enough about it to keep an immaculate house}.
wanting to keep an immaculate house for baby.
one who hates noise.
constantly changing my favorite color.
sensitive.
broken-hearted.
mended.
forgiven.
forgiving.
looking for purpose. {i think i found it!}
far too emotional for my own good.
an obvious donner of those emotions.
detail-oriented.
a photography-lover.
a production artist by day. unemployed.
an amateur writer and photographer by night.
a connector.
one who loves touch.
not entrepreneurial.
a former shop-a-holic.
the kind of person who can live anywhere.
known to have a lead foot.
notorious for leaving long rambling messages.
loved.
wanted.
a taker-inner... or a sponge, so to speak.
waiting for spring.
always looking for a photo.
sometimes sad.
often happy.
a fan of breakfast.
not a breakfast eater.
not too old to wear pig tails.
a big fan of sushi. {temporarily on hold}
close to being debt-free.
not one who owns a scale.
finding it more difficult to remember things. {especially now!!... pregnancy brain}
waiting for the day when i can wear glasses.
fearfully and wonderfully made.
a believer.
aware that i lack certain social skills.
spontaneous.
forever missing my father.
a bit of a worrier, but less than i used to be.
acrophobic.
tired of my bad habits.
a jack of all trades, master of none.
still deciding what i want to be when i grow up.
drawn to funny people.
hooked on ice cream and french fries. {especially now!!}
a dancer. {not really, but i'd like to think so.}
waiting for something.
aware i have so much to learn.
not a technology geek.
more right-brained than left.
figuring things out.
the most organized and unorganized person i know.
lacking discipline in many areas.
hoping to age gracefully.
often wishing i could go back.
one who needs affirmation.
tired too often. {especially now!!}
accepting of others.
critical of others, too.
not who i thought i would be by now.
resilient.
letting go.
praying small, quiet prayers.
not eloquent in speech.
not poised.
delicate.
decisive.
passive.
beginning to show my age most in my hands.
never compared to a celebrity like my friends are.
complicated.
{duh... i'm a female.}
waiting for some miracles. {minus one}
done with this list.
{even though there's so much more...}

cropped s.p. from last winter

the rest of the self-portraits i took that day are here.

12 comments:

Jamie said...

Love it!

Tracey said...

loved reading your list. There are a lot of similarities between us...like A LOT. It was eerie.
Fan of breakfast
always looking for a photo
detail-oriented
not entrepeneurial
can live anywhere
constantly changing my favorite color!
HATES NOISE
bit of a germ-a-phobe
forgiving
a sponge (my body has suffered bc of this)
does not own a scale
finding it difficult to remember things
a believer
still feels like a little girl
dreamer
artist
singer--love a good harmony
creative
perfectionist
totally type b
always cold!
LOVE THE BEACH
sun lover
nostalgic
wanting to be a morning person
smart enough to get by
craver of learning--esp the Bible
form tv watcher
DARK chocolate all the way!
very critical of myself
film buff
starter not a finisher
runner (until I broke my toe)
most at peace in AUTUMN. YES!
lover of good design
spacial problems are my forte
people always comment that I am gentle
totally impatient driver
MUSIC MUSIC MUSIC (have you gotten the new Civil Wars album???)
a connector, totally.
loves touch
former shop-a-holic. In fact, just today I was amazed at how much that desire has been taken from me.
I am so guilty of leaving rambling messages.
waiting for spring--winter is hard.
so not a tech geek. I suck a technology.

A few differences:
I'm 41
I love love love to read
can't do sushi
never like MASH

So there we go. I think we were separated at birth. :)

~Hurricane B~ said...

It has been so long since I have been able to read blogs and post comments and such. BUT OH MY GOSH. I am so, so so THRILLED FOR YOU. Even just through your blog..your love, passion and just radiant life seeps through. I am glad to see that the sad point and the gloom are gone. You will be an amazing mother. Congrats.

georgia b. said...

thanks, bridgette!
great to hear from you. =)

thanks, miss jamie!

tracey... LOVED your comment/list. funny, 'cause i already have a twin. i guess i was a triplet, not a twin. =) you are right... very eerie! but cool!

Lisa said...

Hehehe I love this list! It's fun to look back to see the differences that even just a year can make. I love it. I am so happy to know you, even if just through the internet. :)

Oliag said...

Just loved this Georgia! You inspire me to write my own list but it may take forever as I am not good with words as you know:)

Kim said...

Thanks so much for popping over to my blog after Picture Winter! Many thanks, too, for all of your comments on my photos in the gallery.

I love your list and how you have updated it with changes since last year. Congratulation on your biggest change, mama-to-be!

Love your name, too! My youngest daughter's name is Georgia.

Meri said...

So much joy and good stuff in your life. . . and more to come!

JMC said...

Love this Georgia! I love that you wrote the list and love even more that you decided to go back and see all the things that have changed! Beautiful!

spread your wings said...

great post. i like the comparison and so happy for you and your new self
great portraits too. : )

Stacey said...

How did I miss commenting on this post?? I love it. Loved reading all these things about you, although I feel like I know most of them already. Which is crazy seeing that I've only really "known" you for a few weeks.

I feel like Tracey in that there are a lot of similarities between us it's a little eerie. In fact, I look back at your list and Tracey's list and if I were to do my own it would pretty much be the same. From sensitive to connector to loving touch, the rambling msgs, always looking for a photo, a sponge and needing affirmation, passive and type b and complicated...and green eyed! :-) You're a runner? I'm trying to be a runner! So not a finisher, wish I was. I'm ALWAYS cold, nostalgic, a procrastinator, not the best communicator but a really good listener. VERY critical about myself, soft-spoken. About the only thing I could find different is that I am not a germ-a-phobe!

We were meant to be friends! :-)

georgia b. said...

yay, stacey! now i'm a quadruplet with my twin and you and tracey!! =)

i might have guessed you are a lot like me. i figured when i found your blog and saw your style of writing like you are talking to someone in person... the way i like to write.

i hope to become more like you in the sense of photography and writing, though... to become as gifted as you!

p.s.
we ARE meant to be friends!