cheek water

these are some old photos... i think about a year old. one of the benefits of having a non-working camera is that, instead of spending time taking and editing new photos, you can use that time to go back into ancient folders that were long forgotten and look for old gems to post. better late than never.

i barely edited these shots... because, honestly, i didn't really want to change the mood. i thought they were perfect, just as they are. i mean, i realize they aren't perfect... not like the perfection that some photographers put out there because they wouldn't dare share their imperfect work. first of all, if i'm gonna be real, i have to admit i'm sort of tired of "perfect" photography {if that's something that actually exists}. but secondly, i enjoy looking at in-the-moment photos much more than i do the perfectly staged ones. i guess created moments in staged photos have their place. but i just get bored with looking at them after a while. not only that, but i think trying to create them is exhausting, as well. so my personal goal as a photographer {when i have working equipment again} is to never slip into a trap of feeling like i have to create a moment. i only want to find moments... and then, click away.

the moment captured above was one of my favorites. isaac had just learned how to climb onto our very tall bed. he loved {and was fascinated by} cell phones at the time. i had been in the bedroom taking pictures of the recent makeover i gave it {in our old house}. mr. b was chillin' on the bed, enjoying a rare moment of uncharacteristic neatness in that room... one in which the bed was actually made for a change.

when i saw how much fun they were having, i had to turn my attention toward them. makeover photos could wait. i've seen a lot of dads who are such good buds with their kids... especially with sons. but i don't know if i've ever seen a father-and-son buddy-ship quite like the one my husband and son have. likely, this is only because i'm close enough to them to see their relationship on a level that i wouldn't be able to closely witness in other families. so i'm fairly certain that there are many similar bonds elsewhere. but i still like to think that they are among the closest of father-son duos i've ever known.

last night, isaac and i had to say goodbye to the mister, as we drove him to the train station where he would board a chicago-bound train to meet his brother so they could leave on an early flight this morning. their mom is at home in florida, recovering from open-heart surgery, so they both took a couple days off and hopped a plane to see her.

we sat at the kitchen table over dinner last night, and the downer mood that had been building up in me all day {at the thought of his looming departure} finally morphed into tears that first welled up in my eyes and eventually leaked out down my face. what got me was when isaac went to sit in his dad's lap after he finished eating. i was glad he did so, because that's something he rarely does while we're still all at the table. being that we had to leave for the station right from dinner, it gladdened me to see them spend some quality time together before mr. b had to leave.

it made me happy and sad, all at the same time. as we sat there enjoying our last few minutes at home together, i caught isaac's attention when he noticed the tears trickling down my face.

he quizically looked at me for a bit and then finally spoke with a soft voice, describing {in the only way he knew how} what he saw.

"cheek...water," he said as he pointed at my tears.

oh, how precious. sweet that he noticed. sweet that he said it that way. sweet that it made me smile.

i'll never call tears tears again. from here on out, they've been dubbed cheek water. {isaac coined it. i dubbed it.} it's adorable. how could i go back to plain old tears ever again? cheek water sounds like the name of the chief's daughter in some native american tribe, doesn't it?

though it was not his intention, it brought the biggest smile to my face, and i soon forgot how much i was going to miss mr. b or how much i knew our little man was going to miss him, too.

i've been quite weepy lately. lots of things going on... lots of disappointments and such, as well as other contributing factors. the weepiness is sort of uncharacteristic of my lately-usual self. {i used to be quite a crier back before i had isaac. but since he's been in my life, i cry so much less... perhaps because isaac is depleting the cheek-water vat for us all, and there's not much left to go around?? but there seems to be plenty for me lately.}

anyway, i was having a tough time with mr. b leaving... more than i thought i would. the small amount of difficulty i had with it gave me a glimpse into what it's like for military wives who are separated from their husbands for such long periods of time. gosh, i feel for them. if a mere three days could have that much of an effect on me, i can't imagine how they get through those months on end of having their spouses gone. i'm guessing that does not make me good military wife material. i'd be a mess!

well... all that to say, at the end of the day, i'm very glad my husband went to see his mom. we wish we could have joined them, too. but at least he was able to go... thanks to his generous brother who bought his plane ticket. when his brother approached him with the offer, i strongly encouraged him to go, even though i know how torn he was. he really wants to be near his mom at this time, but i could see it was kind of getting to him to have to leave us, too. 

after we dropped him off at the train, isaac cried out for a good while and said through his tears cheek water, "dada, come back." {it broke my heart.} but almost immediately after that, he said, "choo-choo train, come back." that was when i knew he was gonna be okay. and then we were off to treat ourselves to frozen yogurt, because we both deserved it. at least that's what we told each other, and we're stickin' to it!

the good news is, in just a day and a half, mr. b will be back, and we'll hardly remember he was ever gone.

some other never-before-seen photos i unearthed these past couple days are these next few... taken during a summer visit from mr. b's parents last year. since we're missing them so much and are sending wishes of a speedy recovery my mother-in-law's way, i thought i'd include them today. i don't think it's difficult to see just how much isaac loves his grandma, nor how much she loves him right back.

get well from us all, sweet "abby"... whether we're here or there to say so.

love,
isaac, mr. b and me

project life and weekending

this is why i want to keep going with my project life 365 endeavor... because of what she said.

i want to look back just as she was able to and have something visibly tangible to pour over as a reminder of my days... our days.

but i'm finding that my daily pics don't turn into daily posts. and then they just get pushed deeper and deeper into the folders i view by date... forgotten. so i will now be posting my daily shots once per week in the format you see below. we'll see how this goes. i'd really like to give it the old college try. {what does that mean, anyway? i use it all the time, but never really wondered what it meant until just now.}

anyway... wish me luck!!

here goes for week twelve {not in chronological order}, hopefully the first of many...

monday – light  •  sunday – cheers
tuesday – in the house  •  thursday – weather
saturday – musical  •  wednesday – fresh
friday – on the wall

i had missed my opportunity for "cheers" and "weather" on sunday and thursday. so i made up for opportunities missed yesterday... first when isaac and i attended a birthday party in the morning and then when his uncle drew came to visit all of us in the afternoon.

we happily attended the one-year birthday part of a sweet little boy i had the pleasure of photographing a while back. the theme was sesame street {complete with a fabulous elmo cake that isaac would have loved on so many levels!}, and we left with party favors that were all things colorful and baby sesame street. isaac quite contentedly rode the entire hour home with party balloons in hand, deep in a droopy-eyed food coma. so i snapped a shot or two of the balloons in the rear-view mirror {while stopped at a light, of course}, because they went so well with the warm and sunny {finally!} day that we were enjoying. was thinkin' "weather balloons" for a title on that one.

in his food-coma-turned-nap, isaac remained in the car when we arrived home so he could ride along with mr. b. to the train station where they would pick up uncle drew. mr. b's brother took the outbound train from chicago to spend the day with us. just three months ago, he could have walked to our house from the station. but now, we have to pick him up twenty minutes from our new home... one of the only drawbacks of our move.

anyway, we enjoyed a good two hours of healthy eating... nothing but the best. a big bowl of doritos for all. beer for the boys. cider for me. juice for isaac. that's what saturdays are made of, if you ask me!

when i saw isaac wanting to toast his uncle drew and dad with his sippy cup {a new thing around here that happens at nearly every meal}, i ran to get my camera. cheating a little, i guess... as "cheers" was to found the sunday before. but better late than never. it still did what it was intended to do... mark a memory of our daily lives and how things are... what we do. what we see. where we're at.

i hope i never forget the way he loves to toast us with his juice and say "cheeeers!" and i hope to never forget the way the light came in through the window and silhouetted him as he hung out with his dad and uncle.

come sunday morning, isaac was happy to awake and find that his toys and balloons from the day before were still there.

and i, too, was happy to wake up and find that it all wasn't just a dream.

showered with love

yup!! one of my dearest friends just had her first baby last night.

she is currently in the hospital with her sweet baby boy, and i'm sure she feels nothing like the chipper bright-eyed mama-to-be you see above. that shot was taken at her baby shower a couple weeks ago. {ahhh... the joys of being a brand-spakin' new mom. i hope she can catch up on her sleep at the hospital before she has to head home.}

since i have not yet been to the hospital and can't get some newborn photos until i do {hopefully tomorrow... 'cause i'm so dying to hold that sweet little peanut in my arms!}, i'll post the photos of her shower instead, because... well, it's high time. i mean, the baby is here and we know the gender and everything. these photos are nearly a forgotten thing of the past in light of the spectacular news that so many have been waiting to hear!... IT'S A BOY!

so hurry up and look at these, 'cause soon there won't be anything but newborn pictures, and things such as baby bumps will be long forgotten. *wink*

without further ado...

a little foreshadowing with that blue "b" at the beginning of the banner, don't ya think? nobody really knew if it was a boy or a girl, except the doctor, i guess. but i should have known when i saw this. i mean, pink doesn't even show up until about half-way down the banner for cryin' out loud!

well, it was your typical lovely baby shower...

good food.


pretty decorations.


little vignettes of whimsical, child-like touches in books and toys and all things baby.


the obligatory photos of mom and dad as babies.

lots and lots of gifts. {did i mention there were lots? like the most i've ever seen! the shot below is of just one table!}

oh... and my favorite touch of all... this clothesline of baby onsies. some for boys. some for girls.

and again with the blue coming first! how did i not see it?

isn't it precious, though? it really made me smile, and was lots of fun to photograph, too.


even though i was convinced kellie was having a girl, i was smitten with this little number...

might have snagged it for isaac if he wasn't already too big for it's precious little tininess.

anyway, like i said... it was all quite lovely. lots of green and yellow decor {not just because those are gender-neutral colors, but also because they were their wedding colors almost two years ago}.

here was another favorite touch... the message on the cake that kellie's mom thought up.

i thought it was so creative, and the perfect double meaning for my friend's special pregnancy. she had to be closely monitored during her pregnancy, and it was known the birth would have to take place earlier than the due date. lots of prayers were going up for mama and baby these last several months... all the way up to yesterday when baby stepped onto the scene. so it was a special delivery, indeed.

anyway, all those traditional, yet special baby shower things were nice {and fun for me with a camera}. but it was this special girl that made the day beautiful...

it was so much fun to see her walking around talking to the many women gathered there for her and her growing family.

she even got in some practice time with her niece. content here...


and not so much here...

hahaha! that's the really good practice!

i already knew she'd be a natural as a mom {and her hubby as a dad}, because i've observed them with other kids before... including my own son who loves them to pieces. i know she is going to make a great mom! it's actually very strange to see her take on this new role, especially when i think back to when i met her. she was just a kid, really. almost fresh out of high school, still single. just a girl lovin' life and fashion and friends and working. it would have seemed surreal at the time to look down the road and imagine her as a mom. i can't wait to be fellow moms together! and i'm so excited isaac will have a baby "brother" and pal.

so here's the part i don't want to admit... i was wrong about what the gender of the baby would be. from day one, i told her she was having a girl. well, that is to say, she asked. and then i told her. a guess, really. but a hunch, too.

i love that they decided not to find out. we didn't either. it's a fun element, and for both her and i with scheduled inducings, it was nice to have that element, because the element of surprise as to which day the baby would be born was taken away. so getting the surprise of finding out if it's a boy or girl after the birth sort of helps replace that.

anyway, the shower planners {or perhaps it was just kellie} had the best idea... they would request on the invitation that guests wear either pink or blue, depending on what they thought the sex of the baby would be. so, of course, i wore pink!

{hmmmm. note to self. you have lost your hunch-mojo! just chalk it up to mommy-brain and try not to get involved in these things in the future.} =)

there sure were a lot of pinks there! i was one of them, though not seen, because i was behind the camera in the pictures below. kellie's mom wanted a picture of all the pinks and all the blues.

us pink-thinkers thought we had it in the bag!

but, alas...

and now i will eat my words for the next twelve to fourteen conversations i have with kellie and bobby when the subject comes up... as many times as i previously insisted in conversation to them that it was a girl. last time i play that game!

anyway, before the gift-opening began, i went around taking some pictures of guests... for kellie and her mom to have as part of their memories of the day.

this is kellie's mom with one of the little girls in attendance.

kellie with a couple of her closest friends. they were sitting across from me, so i was able to snap a couple pictures of them while they chatted.

kellie and her mama.


and a few more.. with mama-in-law too! two very proud grandmas! it shows all over their faces!

okay, now for the gifts. don't worry. i didn't take a picture of every single gift as it was opened. if i had, you'd be here forever... or you'd leave now! and i figure this is already long enough as is.

so i just hit the highlights, and you can browse through them below.